If You Cannot Choose One

When you make a choice means you have been able to give up some options to pick one. Making a choice never leaves humans alone. Children start making decision when they are small. In a shop, they pick a chocolate, they choose one doll among several, they do not eat some food or they sing one of the songs that they know. Later, when they grow up, they come to make choices more important and more difficult. They choose their friends, the clubs and groups to join, and the field they like to study in high school. The more they grow up, the more the situations and conditions get serious. When they are young enough, they have to choose their jobs, their houses, and their partners.

However, making a good choice is not so easy. Choosing one option means giving up the others. As a result, there should be something to evaluate the options. Children usually evaluate thing based on their emotions. They choose what is more attractive and beautiful. Later, they learn to add a little logic to their criteria. The more they get old the more they think reasonably and logically about the available options.

Emotion or logic both can be a good power to push someone for making a choice; however, it is not always the same. Sometimes, they might be in a situation that they cannot put the priority on one option. In their ideas, all options might have the same value, they cannot sacrifice any of them for the other one. Therefore, some people may ask others’ help and opinion. For example, they ask their parents, friends, a counselor or someone who has experience in that case. Some others may choose another way to get rid of this dilemma.

Here, I will tell you one way of asking opinion that some people in my society believe in, Tafaol, or Faal gereftan. When someone is unsure about something and does not know what to do, he or she can try Hafiz’s, the Persian poet, help. First, he or she is required to pray for Hafiz and then open his book of poetry, Divaan-e-Hafiz randomly. Any piece of poem, which was at the beginning of page, will imply the answer. He or she will understand which way to choose or what to do. However, this way might seem very silly for some people, some others strongly believe in that.

In conclusion, despite that making a decision has a strong relationship with our feelings or reasons, sometimes neither of them can help us. We cannot always rely on ourselves and it is better to share it with others and benefit from their helpful experiences.

4 Responses to If You Cannot Choose One

  1. ztandee says:

    Making a good choice is certainly difficult. I too was in a dilemma once a upon a time. I agree with you, emotions and logic both can be of great importance. And the Hafiz’s sounds interesting. Does it really work? What do you feel about it? I also think decision making moment should be shared with others. However, i also feel it is all up to us and sharing won’t fulfill our necessities either because we are the one, who is making decisions, right?

  2. kalpana23 says:

    Hello Zahra!
    It is very interesting going through your blog entry. I appreciate the way you incorporated some of the examples of dilemmas people encounter from their childhood to their youth. It would have been much better if you had included dilemmas in elderly lives. Nevertheless, the entry seems complete by itself.

    You are right that sometimes people are unable to choose the best alternative as they think all the options they have are indispensable. I think, in that case, it is better to consult with our near and dear ones. After listening to their suggestions, we can think logically and rationally which the best option is.

    Like Tandin said, Hazif’s stuff sounds quite interesting, but I was curious to know if you also believe that.

  3. roksanahasib says:

    Hey Zahra,

    Its really surprised me the way people in your community try to make decision when they are confused. I think it is a very unique way to get a hint from a poet’s book. However, i do think that it is really strange. How can one risk his own life by making choice in this way. I agree with you that it is a good way to consult with other when you are confused. But eventually, i think it is always better to follow your heart and made the decisions of your life by youself so that in far future, even if you fail, you will be satisfied that you had at least followed you heart. Moreover, you won’t have anybody to blame for your failure. On the other hand, if you get succeed, you will be very proud on yourself that you made the right choice.

    As other i also want to know “Do you delieve in that?”

  4. rstha says:

    I too agree with you that the more we grow old our decisions are more serious having a long term effect on our lives. I really enjoyed reading about Hafiz and l would like to try it as well. As our decision leads us to a certain position we must decide carefully analyzing all the aspects related to it.

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