Isn’t Hate Merely the Result of Wounded Love?
April 7, 2011 3 Comments
While reading the chapter “Rice husband” from Lena St. Clair’s point of view in the novel, The Joy Luck Club by Amy Tan, I found myself re-reading the sentence, “Isn’t hate merely the result of wounded love?” This is the sentence that coerced me to think about human relationship with their family, friends, and other humans. I was unconsciously relating this sentence with daily life.
Love is the foundation of life. We love those who befriend us. We start to care about and understand them. We go deeper into our relationship and there is very little gap among us. However, with the passage of time, we get acquainted with their goodness and flaws. It is after we have started to love them, the sense of hatred arouses within us. Their tiny flaw infuriates us and we feel like we do not want them any longer in our life, and their presence does not make any difference in our life. This human nature in the tranquility of love and hate governs us with emotional challenges.
In order to hate someone, you need to get hurt by them. To get hurt, you should have emotional bonding with them so that they would be able to pinch your heart knowingly or unknowingly. For all these, you need to have affection with them. In other words, you should love them. We can take the example of Lena’s hatred towards Harold, her husband. He is the one who she had once desperately fallen for and loved so passionately. In contrast, now she has hatred because she is hurt by him.
Sometimes hatred becomes the way to express love. This may sound weird but it is the fact that if you are in love with someone and you can’t find out the way to express it, you start to bother them and try to grab their attention. For instance, can see the vivid picture of Arnold showing his hatred for Lena for he couldn’t express his love towards her. On the other hand, Lena too hates Arnold. Unknowingly she has already fallen for Arnold and she puts her full effort of showing hatred towards him.
So, if you hate someone, it means you love them and you hate because you are hurt. Moreover, if someone shows hatred towards you, don’t get furious for they care for you.