Can i be myself???

Can I be MYSELF? Can I BE THE ONE MY PARENTS want me to be? Can I be both? Can I balance these choices: myself and an expected daughter? In the chapter “Half and Half,” Rose was disobedient to her mother because she wanted to be herself, to keep her own identity. She couldn’t meet her mother’s expectation; indeed, she failed to do many things that her mother expected her to do. Is it right to be as yourself, to live as you want, and to do as you like? Last night, after the rehearsal for Ms.Fatema’s program, one of my friends was very upset, even indignant. Why? Just because of comments of the audience on our performance. Actually, our performance was nice, but it was not suitable for an academic environment because it might be too sexual. I told her to keep these steps if she didn’t want to alter them (Sorry Madam). I told her to do what she wanted without considering other’s opinions. “As long as you feel happy,” I said. “It is easier said than done. If you don’t care about others, why do you do your hair? Why do you make up? Also, why do you help people? You help them just because you want them to be grateful to you,” she retorted. Her answer made me think a lot. Do I help people just because of their gratitude? Or do I help them because I want to prove my kindness? Do I help them to keep pace with my friends because everyone is trying to do good things? Am I selfish? Am I only concerned about myself and my happiness? After conceiving thoroughly, I acknowledged my selfishness. Sometimes, I also want to receive gratitude; I also want to have many friends, and I also want to become “famous.” I have talked to myself to live as I like and do what I want without considering people surrounding me: I burst into laughter whenever I am happy; I burst into crying whenever I am sad. However, these actions seem be my pretense, aren’t they? Sorry my friends whom I have helped just because of my happiness and feelings. I will try my best to help you just because of you, but not me. I will try to be myself but also take account into your thoughts and feelings.

One Response to Can i be myself???

  1. vythai says:

    Tram. Thanks for sharing such a emtional experience. I think you are so sensitive because we help others to be better, it is very good. At least you think about it, it is worthier than other who never help anyone. You don’t do harm for them. Don’t be upset because you don’t help them because of your feeling. Let’s think about the time before you think about yourself. obviously, you help them first because of them. that is so important that your first motivation is good. You need a “thanks” or you feel proud doesn’t mean that you are bad. It is nomal, isn’t it? In any way, wish you luck on your project to be an overperfect person.

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